i don't have haters, only fans in denial
December 2011
Play
i have all this crap i want to blog about but i can't because i'm not allowed to yet.
fml.
“So avoid using the word ‘very’ because it’s lazy. A man is not very tired, he is exhausted. Don’t use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason, boys - to woo women - and, in that endeavor, laziness will not do. It also won’t do in your essays.”
—Dead Poets Society, 1989 (via gravelimbs)
My family when someone wakes up before anyone else:
- Me: Tips toes quietly through the house, trying not to make a sound.
- Everyone else: Let me just stomp throughout the house, slam a bunch of doors, and bang some pots together in the kitchen, I'm sure no one will mind.
Who invented the blow job?
Like, who wakes up one day and thinks “today, I will suck a dick”
probably the same person that decided, “Hmm, if I squeeze these things under the cow, what happens? Oh, liquid comes out! Let’s drink it!”
Getting a text/invite from a person you don't like:
Listen
Go The Fuck To Sleep- Samuel L. Jackson.